I know I should be updating more, and it’s been over a month since my last post, but I really don’t know what to say. It’s not like there’s nothing to write about, it’s just that I don’t know how much I want to put out there for the public to read.

I do have some good news though. My grandpa is finally home after almost two months in the hospital. He was misdiagnosed, and they took him off all the crazy meds they were giving him, and now he’s back to normal. For the longest time we thought he’d never come home, and we had even started making arrangements to put him in a home. If the doctors had paid attention and talked to one another, he wouldn’t of been hospitalized in the first place.

I’ve been really thinking about doing a work abroad program in the next couple years. I either want to go to Ireland or Australia, and I would only go for about four months. I would love to just jump on a plane and go now, but unfortunately it’s not that simple. I’ve started putting money away in case I do decide this is something I want to do.  I think it would be an excellent experience for me, and help me get over my anxiety issues. I have a fear of uncertainty and doing things outside the box. This would definitely help to show me that I don’t need to be scared of that, as well as make me more independent.  Plus, it’s a great opportunity to travel without having to worry about not having a job, and it’s the perfect time to do it since I don’t have any tie downs… other than my cat, but my mom would take care of him.

If anyone has ever done anything like this, or knows someone who can, let me know what the experience was like!

I’m having a hard time staying positive this week. Despite everything that’s [not] going on, I’ve been trying to stay optimistic and hopeful, especially when it comes to finding another job and moving out, it’s really hard. Everything is falling through, and I hear non-stop from my dad about how I owe him money and need to pay rent; yet he knows I’m only working about two days a week and it’s not looking like there will be work any time soon for my full time job.

I’m so unbelievably stressed and my body is showing it. My face is so broken out, I’m shedding my hair like crazy (big clumps keep coming out in the shower), my jaw is constantly clenched and I have tension headaches everyday. I feel like I’m falling apart, and I’m wondering how much longer I can stay sane. All the jobs I’ve applied for I didn’t get, the two apartments I had lined up fell through, and I’m almost ready to give up. I may have to ask for my old job back at Tim Horton’s. I’m that desperate, and I’m running out of options.

I’m also sick of everyone telling me to quit my full time job and move away. Sure, that sounds easy, but it’s not. I actually LIKE my job. And not just as a painter, I like who I work with. I wouldn’t want to do this for any other company. And moving away isn’t that simple. It cost money to move. I can’t even move into town, let alone another city. I’m tired of hearing it.

Sorry for such a negative entry, but I need to vent a little. =/

P.S. I’ve been updating the gallery lately too

I finally threw together a new layout since I had the previous one for over a year. I’m not really digging it, though. But whatevs, it’s staying for now.

My Christmas and New Years went pretty well. Christmas was spent with family; opening presents in the morning, having a big breakfast, then over to my aunt’s for a turkey dinner… with TONS of desserts. Speaking of which, I’ve totally gained 5lbs since I’ve been out of work. Not doing anything + eating lots of junk = bad Amy I need to change that!

For New years I had one of my good friends come to my place for some drinking, hot tubbing and dancing. We started early, so we barely made it past midnight. I think I passed out around 12:30. Ha! But it was fun. The day after I think we both took it easy, I drove her home around noon and I spent the rest of the day lounging on the couch watching movies.

I’m still not back at work yet, but I have been working part time with my sister and her job doing clerical work as well as cleaning. I like it there, but I can’t wait to start painting again. I think it will still be some time before it starts back up.

I don’t think I’ve posted this on here yet, but I did on LJ quite awhile ago… I’m going to be an aunt. My lil’ sister is having a baby, due this summer (I think the due date is July 7th… but don’t quote me on that).

Oh, and I just got an email back from the local pilot instructor about when classes start and costs. They start in March so I’m hoping I can come up with the money for ground school/books in time to start them! I think I need about $570 plus tax. Fingers crossed I can do it!

Ok, I seriously need to get up and do something.

I had such a loooong day Friday. I worked 11pm-7am Thursday and had to get ready and leave right for Toronto afterwards on Friday to be there by 11am. I’m not saying just yet why I was there, but I have a good feeling about it! I was there for a few hours and got to catch up with my friend Jenn a bit, then by about 1:30pm I left for Oshawa to see Jill & Larry. I didn’t go to sleep until about 9pm making it 25 hours for me… I’m not one for staying up that long, so I was exhausted.

Saturday Jill, Larry & I left Oshawa for Tweed and spent the weekend at My Uncle’s farm for his annual corn roast. Not very many people showed up, but I think everyone had fun anyway. Took lots of pictures (like usual) and I posted a few on my flickr, so go see them

Turned out to be a sunny day

Originally uploaded by Amy-Marie

I had an amazing weekend last weekend. I hung out with my friend Jen Saturday and we had so much fun. I hadn’t seen in several months so it was good catching up. I love hanging out with her but our schedules don’t allow us to see each other that much. Sunday I went with my family to see my aunt, uncle, cousin and her husband. It was great seeing them as well.

This weekend is our annual “August Party” at the house and a few people have shown up already. It’s mostly friends of my parents, but it will be good to see them all again as I’ve known most of these people since I was little.

My guitar skills are improving slowly but surely. I even did a “C” cord the other day which I couldn’t do first day. I was so excited when I got it, though I was only able to get it that one time. I’m scared to even see what “F” looks like. Lol.

I was thinking of doing a Harry Potter layout next since the trailer is out for the 6th movie and I’ve been re-reading my HP books, so I have “Harry Potter Fever”. haha. I just have been too lazy to start it yet…